“I have always been competitive by nature. I like playing single-player games like Tetris and Doodle Jump, where the goal is to beat your own highest score. At first, there is a steep learning curve, and it’s exciting as you frequently set new records. Eventually, there comes a point when you can’t clear the lines fast enough or you miss the jump to the next platform. As you go further into the game, new “top scores” become more rare, and the game becomes less exciting as it becomes nearly impossible to beat your best score.
For me, there has been a similar struggle in my pursuit of education and medicine. Each step is harder than the last, as I continue to select myself into an increasingly smaller group. Reaching the next level becomes more and more difficult. The longer I play, the more I realize that the lines never stop falling and there is always the next platform. It is a daily struggle not to lose sight of why I became a doctor: to help and make meaningful connections with people, often when they are at their most vulnerable. ‘When does my competitive nature need to be culled?’ ‘Do I use my desire to have a meaningful life as an excuse to be lazy?’ These are the questions I wrestle with as I balance the instinct to constantly compete with myself and my desire to live a life filled with joy, connection, and meaning.”
